Memories
by Ghosty-Goo Girl
Summary: Sakura's point of view after Kakashi's death. AU. Slight hints towards KakaNaru and SasuSaku.


**A/N: A quick, angsty drabble I did when I was bored and had nothing better to do. I honestly have no idea where this one came from, so I'm really sorry if you think it's crap, if not then I'm glad at least one person liked it. :)**

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It was Naruto who had found him that day. You'd think that it would have been a miserable day, one that would fit the mood of the people who had been close to him. But it wasn't. It was like every other day in Konoha; bright, sunny. Happy people going about their business; the usual.

I think that that was why no one could really believe it at first. I certainly couldn't until it really hit me about a week later. Denial that our own sensei was dead. Dead by his own hand, that I'd later been told much like his father, except under different circumstances.

It affected Naruto worse than me I think. Maybe because he was closer to Kakashi than me, or maybe because of other reasons that for so long I turned a blind eye to. For a month Naruto refused to accept that Kakashi was dead, if anyone offered their condolences he would say there was no need, that Kakashi was just on a mission and that he'd be back soon. He missed the funeral but I suspect that that was what he wanted.

I couldn't call it coincidence that my teammate had locked himself in his apartment for a solid two weeks after Jiraiya had returned to the village. The Sannin had most likely had a talk with his godson, or maybe knocked some sense into him, as much as you could into Naruto. I could imagine it was harsh but at the same time necessary.

As we'd been told before; death is apart of our world, we must live with it else we perish away too. No one said it was easy to live while your friends or even family had long since passed. Perhaps it was one too many for Kakashi to live with any more. It upsets me whenever I'm reminded of the days we'd spend in the sun as team 7. Now two of the four of us had gone, but I feared that soon there would only be me left to relive those memories in my own mind.

To think that I alone would have to create new memories for team 7 tears me up inside.

I used to visit Kakashi's grave with Naruto but now I rarely see my friend and teammate. He had turned cold toward everyone as the months passed, no longer the Naruto we'd all once known and loved. I never really realized that you could feel like someone close to you had died, even when they were stood next to you.

I often replace the old flowers with new at the grave, out of respect for a dead friend, not just a teacher. Sometimes I feel hurt or guilty that as a medic-nin, I couldn't even help him. I hadn't even seen the signs that he had been thinking about doing this to himself. Why hadn't he come to me? Or even Naruto?

I think it was a year after Kakashi's death that I was mistakenly told by Tsunade that Kakashi had left a note. Naruto had found it when he'd found the man in a puddle of his own blood, only he and Tsunade had known about it. Of course I was angry at first, that I hadn't even been informed about the letter, considering I had also been apart of team 7. In the end Tsunade had pulled it out of one of her many files and had handed it over for me to read.

I wish I'd never done so now. It was like reopening a wound that had almost healed. For days I would just break out into tears, objects and places brought back even the smallest of memories like ghosts of older days. Now I know why Naruto was barely ever about. Only now it felt like I'd lost two friends that same day rather than one.

Eventually I'd recovered from the pain I'd been feeling, if only slightly. I'd continued on with life, lucky to even glimpse Naruto among the villagers. Months later I had been informed that Naruto had gone travelling with Jiraiya, I tried to tell myself I was hurt that he hadn't even said goodbye but I guess he was a ghost of my past now, along with the rest of my team. I just hope he finds happiness with wherever he's gone.

Now, ten years later, I find myself reminiscing as I stand at Kakashi's grave on the anniversary of his death. Bending down I replace the old flowers with new and explain to my only child who's grave it is I visit each year. I leave out certain details but I never forget to tell her how brave my old sensei used to be and how my teammate is out there now, protecting the village with all his might. As for the other teammate...well I spend every night with him, making up for the days we'd lost while we'd both been making different memories with old friends.


End file.
